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The Wombanditos

They’re absconding for a day. But when trouble pursues this monarch-in-waiting, can they make a crafty escape and survive?

 

Princess Eloise Hydra Gumball III rarely gets a moment to breathe. So when her old friend suggests they steal away to an autumnal festival, the sixteen-year-old sneakily hitches a ride from Court with him so they can spend time together. But while bored waiting for a return carriage and sampling some delicious berries, they’re ambushed by a gang of vicious wombats… leaving the young royal unconscious.

Waking to find herself bound and gagged in a dirty burrow has Eloise squirming in repulsive discomfort. And even after her buddy rushes in to rescue her, it’ll take some smooth-talking and quick thinking if they’re both going to make it out alive.

Can the queen-to-be convince the near-blind band to set them free before they’re permanently burrowed?

The Wombanditos is a standalone prequel to The Western Lands and All That Really Matters humorous fantasy series. If you like snappy dialogue, lively side stories, and avoiding violence with wit, then you’ll love Andrew Einspruch’s wild adventure.

“I actually found myself smiling as I read this story. There have been plenty of books lately that have made me teary-eyed, but I can’t remember the last time I SMILED while reading. It’s one of those books that’s a great little escape.” — From a review by author L. Danvers.

The Western Lands and All That Really Matters

The Western Lands and All That Really Matters is a humorous fantasy series that’s winning hearts and causing laughs in readers of all ages. It features equality between the species, weak magic, stupidly long names, and wäÿ töö mänÿ ümläüts.

Meet the Author

Andrew Einspruch

Andrew Einspruch is the award-winning author of the humorous fantasy series The Western Lands and All That Really Matters. He’s also had more than 120 children’s books published, both fiction and non-fiction, that have sold around the world. Starting with the four-book “Dunkin’ Dazza” series in the 1990s, Andrew’s work has covered everything from basketball to DNA, biographies to histories to mysteries, outback heroes to Christmas Island red crabs, and from how the rides work at amusement parks to how the Australian Government works (perhaps the greatest mystery of all).

Andrew won the 2020 Fiction Award in the ACT Writing and Publishing Awards. The judges said:

“The Light Bearer succeeds in establishing narrative voice, and showcases technical skill in both storytelling and character development, reflecting the authors’ talent. The world of the story feels alive, and each character has real depth, which informs their actions and helps to drive the plot forward. Andrew Einspruch should be commended for his imaginative and inspired tale, grounded in the realities of the human experience. It’s an intelligent, engaging and deserving winner of the top prize.”

Andrew is the co-founder of the not-for-profit charity the Deep Peace Trust, which fosters deep peace for all species. Based in rural New South Wales, Andrew, his wife Billie, and their adult daughter Tamsin run the Trust’s A Place of Peace, one of Australia’s largest farm animal sanctuaries. The cows, sheep, horses, goats, dogs, cats, and geese, as well as local wildlife including kangaroos, wombats, and cockatoos, are a constant source of inspiration.

If you ask, he’ll deny he ever programmed in COBOL for a bank.

★★★★★

Hilarious with a heart -Terry Pratchett for Young Adults

 

If you’re looking for a new fantasy series, love playful puns and complex and courageous female protagonists, then this species-inclusive romp is for you. This first of a series invites us into the formal world of Court, where Eloise, the heir to the throne, and her resentful twin sister live constrained by Protocol. However a short journey turns into a long and challenging adventure, twisting with page-turning obstacles. There’s sibling rivalry, obnoxious and possibly murderous relatives and the foibles of one charming species after another. Adult readers will enjoy the gently satirical elements reminiscent of Jonathan Swift, and readers-aloud will enjoy the mouth-filling place-names and hilarious diversions.

Things to know: This book is 427 pages. It’s a substantial and thoroughly entertaining read, but its sequel siblings are shorter and tighter. It’s well worth taking the adventure of the first to get some extremely rewarding payoffs in the second and third of the series (all that’s out so far) As other reviewers have noted, it’s a cliff-hanger ending.

Who would enjoy this book: Younger siblings of Terry Pratchett lovers, people who enjoy Skulduggery Pleasant.

 

Janet WK, Amazon Review

★★★★★

Fantasy Fiction Finally Finds Fruit

 

After reading Mr. Einspruch’s first foray into fantasy fiction (The Wombanditos) I was quite eager to jump into its follow-up, The Purple Haze. I was sorely disappointed. In myself. For not reading it sooner. If you’ve read Wombanditos, you no doubt believed as I did, that Andrew had truly mastered the art of the State. The state of Royal Court, that is. And in a fantasy realm, that can be a wee bit tricky, what with human and non-human components intermingling, intertwining and entertaining. His usage of hyperbole, tongue-in-cheek, call-backs, misnomer, mis-quote and delightfully punny cultural references makes for a marvelous, easy read that is absolutely perfect for relaxing into to escape the cares of the day.

 

Thomas Moore, Amazon Review

★★★★★

An enchanting and highly amusing fairy tale

 

I was so not expecting what I got with this book, and boy what a surprise it was! It is funny, puny, witty, charming and so entertaining to read. It kind of takes on a classic fairy tale, with princesses, and kingdoms, and champions and all whatnot, but twist it in such a way that is so new and humorous that I kind of wish all fairy tales were like this.

Curiously Alice, Amazon Review

Start the Series Now!

The Purple Haze

A kidnapped twin sister. A cross-realm rescue mission. Weak and oddly-specific magic. Will an untested princess defy her doomed destiny?

 

Princess Eloise’s life has become dominated by the demands of the Court. The meticulous habits that got her through her days are no match for the disgusting rituals and creepy prophecies dictating her destiny. And the harder she tries to control her path to Future Ruler and Heir, the more she mucks things up.

But when her wayward twin sister disappears, Eloise steps way out of her comfort zone to get her back.

What she thought would be a quick rescue turns into a whirlwind of realm-crossing chaos fraught with imprisonment, embarrassment, and peril. Yet all of that pales in comparison to the shock she finds when she reaches her destination and nothing, including her sister, is what it seems.

Can Eloise discover her inner strength in time to protect her family?

The Purple Haze is the witty first instalment of the Western Lands and All That Really Matters epic fantasy series. If you like clever banter, vibrant medieval realms, and sly pop culture nods, you’ll be enchanted by Andrew Einspruch’s rollicking adventure.

Buy The Purple Haze and dive into this fun, fresh fantasy series.