They’re absconding for a day. But when trouble pursues this monarch-in-waiting, can they make a crafty escape and survive?
Princess Eloise Hydra Gumball III rarely gets a moment to breathe. So when her old friend suggests they steal away to an autumnal festival, the sixteen-year-old sneakily hitches a ride from Court with him so they can spend time together. But while bored waiting for a return carriage and sampling some delicious berries, they’re ambushed by a gang of vicious wombats… leaving the young royal unconscious.
Waking to find herself bound and gagged in a dirty burrow has Eloise squirming in repulsive discomfort. And even after her buddy rushes in to rescue her, it’ll take some smooth-talking and quick thinking if they’re both going to make it out alive.
Can the queen-to-be convince the near-blind band to set them free before they’re permanently burrowed?
The Wombanditos is a standalone prequel to The Western Lands and All That Really Matters humorous fantasy series. If you like snappy dialogue, lively side stories, and avoiding violence with wit, then you’ll love Andrew Einspruch’s wild adventure.
The Western Lands and All That Really Matters
The Western Lands and All That Really Matters is a humorous fantasy series that’s winning hearts and causing laughs in readers of all ages. It features equality between the species, weak magic, stupidly long names, and wäÿ töö mänÿ ümläüts.
Meet the Author
Andrew Einspruch is the award-winning author of the humorous fantasy series The Western Lands and All That Really Matters. He’s also had more than 120 children’s books published, both fiction and non-fiction, that have sold around the world. Starting with the four-book “Dunkin’ Dazza” series in the 1990s, Andrew’s work has covered everything from basketball to DNA, biographies to histories to mysteries, outback heroes to Christmas Island red crabs, and from how the rides work at amusement parks to how the Australian Government works (perhaps the greatest mystery of all).
Andrew won the 2020 Fiction Award in the ACT Writing and Publishing Awards. The judges said:
“The Light Bearer succeeds in establishing narrative voice, and showcases technical skill in both storytelling and character development, reflecting the authors’ talent. The world of the story feels alive, and each character has real depth, which informs their actions and helps to drive the plot forward. Andrew Einspruch should be commended for his imaginative and inspired tale, grounded in the realities of the human experience. It’s an intelligent, engaging and deserving winner of the top prize.”
Andrew is the co-founder of the not-for-profit charity the Deep Peace Trust, which fosters deep peace for all species. Based in rural New South Wales, Andrew, his wife Billie, and their adult daughter Tamsin run the Trust’s A Place of Peace, one of Australia’s largest farm animal sanctuaries. The cows, sheep, horses, goats, dogs, cats, and geese, as well as local wildlife including kangaroos, wombats, and cockatoos, are a constant source of inspiration.
If you ask, he’ll deny he ever programmed in COBOL for a bank.
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The Purple Haze
A kidnapped twin sister. A cross-realm rescue mission. Weak and oddly-specific magic. Will an untested princess defy her doomed destiny?
Princess Eloise’s life has become dominated by the demands of the Court. The meticulous habits that got her through her days are no match for the disgusting rituals and creepy prophecies dictating her destiny. And the harder she tries to control her path to Future Ruler and Heir, the more she mucks things up.
But when her wayward twin sister disappears, Eloise steps way out of her comfort zone to get her back.
What she thought would be a quick rescue turns into a whirlwind of realm-crossing chaos fraught with imprisonment, embarrassment, and peril. Yet all of that pales in comparison to the shock she finds when she reaches her destination and nothing, including her sister, is what it seems.
Can Eloise discover her inner strength in time to protect her family?
The Purple Haze is the witty first instalment of the Western Lands and All That Really Matters epic fantasy series. If you like clever banter, vibrant medieval realms, and sly pop culture nods, you’ll be enchanted by Andrew Einspruch’s rollicking adventure.
Buy The Purple Haze and dive into this fun, fresh fantasy series.